7
I love being a mom, most of the time. I think anyone that says they love motherhood all of the time is either smoking a little something, or telling a little fib.
I have been a mom for almost thirteen years, but have learned the most about mommyhood over the last 6 months. I learned that sometimes it can be so great, that you have to pinch yourself because life can’t be real. Other times, it is so painful you wish you could go into a coma, and wake up to find your kids have graduated, moved out, attended an ivy league school (if you dream, you might as well dream big, right?!) and have kids of their own.
I had my third (and VERY final) baby in mid-April. By mid-June he was paralyzed, blind, and in respiratory arrest. People always told me that boys were easier than girls. I beg to differ.
To sum it up quickly, he is OK now– or mostly OK. His doctors are obsessed with his (lack of) weight gain. I tell them, “Throw him a frickin bone! He can breathe, eat, smileĀ and roll over now, do we really have to obsess about weight gain?”
Through this long ordeal, I have learned the following:
- Poop and pee are a really big deal.
- Feedings can be measured in fractions of a milliliter. An ounce is a LOT of liquid.
- When a baby laughs, fairies really ARE born.
- All nurses will go to heaven. (Except that one frickin nurse in the PICU. She will go somewhere else.)
- There are worse things than lack of sleep.
- It is possible to experience the “for better or worse” in marriage both in the same day.
- A smile is one of the greatest gifts we can give others.
- When a loved one is in the hospital, celebrate successes quietly. Sometimes your best day, is someone else’s worst.
- Time passes regardless of our attitude. Choose to be positive, gracious, kind, appreciative and loving.
- Life is a journey. Everything we experience can be for our benefit.
- If you need to cry, frickin cry!
- You can have fun even when life is falling apart. Don’t believe me, talk to the nurses on the 4th floor. We spent many nights laughing so frickin hard our cheeks hurt.
- Don’t drink too much water before you go to bed. Hmmmm, you might see where I am going with this. Look for a future blog post for more detail.
- Hug a stranger. It is awesome.
- Mommyhood is a roller coaster ride, but one I am so glad that I am on.
Have you had a similar experience? If so, I would love to hear about it. We frickin moms need to stick together.






Motherhood is a blessing. It is a ton of work, but worth every minute of it.
Hello, I’m David’s father. He said we would enjoy your well-written, humorous blog. He’s right. Through parenthood, you either laugh or cry. Might as well get the smile wrinkles going instead of frown wrinkles. Anyway, your blog is great. You might enjoy this article, Natural Childbirth by Dave Barry http://bit.ly/22XZXA although it’s a little off topic, but you sound just like him.
Nice to meet you, Garry! David did a great job with my site. He is such a talented designer.
Thanks for visiting my site and for recommending the Dave Barry blog. I laughed so hard my cheeks hurt. Good stuff.
hey! I hope your little guy is doing better…I sure have thought about you both a lot since last June when David told me he was in the hospital! Being a mom is so great but also one of the hardest things I have ever done. I’ve only been a mom for 3 years and I’m sure there are a lot more joys and struggles yet to come. Good luck!
Lori, I agree with Gary – you DO sound a lot like Dave Barry. It’s great to know that anytime I need a good laugh, I can read one of your blogs.
You really are the bomb!
Hi Anne,
Thanks for visiting the blog and thanks for the comment. Everything is going great now with our little monster. Sometimes it is a struggle to get him to eat, but other than that he is terrific.
I loved motherhood before, but this situation gave me a new perspective. Every day we have with these kiddos is a gift. Being a frickin mom is frickin fantastic.
BTW- I went to your blog: http://www.floralshowers.com. It is pretty sweet!
You are almost funnier online than IRL… almost! Love your frickin blog
.
PS: I say to keep the name. Include in your disclosure policy that the name in no way was meant to be a swear word or offend people and then you’re covered if anyone tries to sue you for being rude LOL!