I received a call from “Mary” this morning. (Her name isn’t really Mary, she just didn’t want me to use her real name on my blog. I am really not sure why, it would have been her ticket to stardom.) She was a little upset over the ringtone her husband assigned to her on his iphone. I am not sure what her problem is, I think a submarine battle cry is perfect for her. That way, every time she calls, he can quickly prepare for war.
I think everyone should have a personalized ringtone. Every time we place a call, our ringtone plays. We get assigned a tone based on popular vote. If you want a fun tone, you have to be super, duper fun.
Your ringtone will be required on all employment applications. That way, when a prospective employer is reviewing your resume, they can quickly understand your personality and work ethic. If you are a hard working man, you may get a ringtone like this:
If you like pegged jeans, hairband t-shirts and think Jo Dirt is the frickin hottest guy ever, you might end up with a ringtone like this:
If you didn’t like your ringtone, you could petition for a different one. The government could set up a committee which would review all petitions and investigate whether a change is deserved. This would be a great use of tax payer money. I think we should lobby for an earmark on the next bill.
I am still trying to figure out what my ringtone should be and am open to suggestions.
What’s your frickin tone?